Family Matters

Growing up I didn't really think how important family was. I lived in New Jersey until the age of 10. Being back here brings back alot great moments in my life. Looking back I really enjoyed living here. My Father wanted to move to Miami. He wanted to be closer to his family. I think it was his parents mostly.  His bond with his brother never really seemed to be strong. There was a sense of separation but I was only a kid making this observation. At 26, I can understand that separation. Issues I won't speak on, only because it needs to be fixed. The emptiness becomes unbearable at times. Over the years growing up in Miami things had changed. Around November of 2000 my Father was diagnosed with lung cancer. It was hard to look him in the face, not knowing what was going to happen.I had to think how he felt and his feelings. My selfishness was getting in the way. I realize i had to be there for him no matter what. May 2001, his father passed. I can't remember the details there was alot going on in my head. Having to come to grips of saying goodbye to my father for a final time on November 6, 2001 wasn't easy at 16. Knowing he won't have to suffer anymore was the only relief. At his wake, I met people I've never seen before and I probably will never see them again. My grandmother's pain was deep. Losing her husband and her son in the same year. I couldn't imagine how she felt, because my thoughts were on the road ahead of me. My father told me to be strong for my mother. He wanted the best for me and my brother's. Now that's on us to make that happen. That's all I think about.  10 years later on this date family is so important to me. But the fact is that sometimes I don't know who my family is. We might share the same last name but there's no connection. My mother lost her job a month after his death. She didn't get any support from anybody but her Own Family. My Father's Wife and Mother to his 3 Children deserved better than that. You people don't know what we went thru. Your absence says it all. Those who have reached out,  thank you and I love you.  I try to forgive and forget but the pain is still relevant. Not a day goes by that I don't think about what he taught me. So I say this you might not have perfect parents or brothers and sisters but love them.We all need the love. My mother always said you pick your friends not family... Peace
10 years later still missing you Pop... Rest In Paradise